Advice to Converts: Preserving Islam in Your Family; A Case for Muslim Congregations. By Shaykh Luqman Ahmad | The Lotus Tree Blog..Imam Suhaib, Joe Bradford, Must Read and Learn

Article by Imam Luqman

I support the work of Imam Suhaib Webb 100 percent and see, next to Imam Siraj, the celebrity imam with the best vision for our community. I think reading this article from our dear respected imam will help him further his good work. Joe Bradford on the other hand, while I am sure is a nice guy, put forth an ahistorical foreign vision of Islam in America which does not build on the work of our elders. He can learn from this.

Why the Convert and Old Muslim Wanna Meet

Ali Eteraz has an interesting piece on his displeasure at the term “revert” for Muslim converts and Tariq Nelson has picked up on this. I share the opinion of both Ali and Tariq that revert is not an appropriate word and I have stopped using it even if I do not agree with all of the arguments that Ali makes in his piece such as his displeasure when people claim the supremacy of their own faith which I see as a fundamental of an authentic faith.

Ali states that the majority of the Muslim community wants nothing to do with converts unless it is for marrying white convert women, putting white brothers up as spokesman, and putting African-American brothers up on the Masjid basketball team and while this is a humorous exaggeration there is some truth to it.

Let me say that I know of numerous authentic and loving friendships between immigrant Muslim brothers and converts and I know of many of these brothers and sisters who have been a great help to one another. Now, having got the PC crap out of the way let me give you some real reasons that immigrant Muslim brothers want to befriend the convert.

  1. The immigrant brother is horny and tired of jerking off to photos of blonde porn stars and wants you to help him solve the mystery of how to actually bang a white girl.
  2. He is trying to get with your sister and offering to make dawah. 
  3. He is offering money to your sister, or mother, for a fake green card marriage,
  4. For some strange reason he needs to ask you where the gay clubs are.
  5. He wants to pay you to write his college papers.
  6. He doesn’t know how to work the remote control.
  7. He wants to take a picture with you to mail back home to his parents.
  8. If he is from Morocco he wants you to marry his sister.
  9. He thinks you are a fanatic for wanting to be a Muslim and needs someone to snitch on to the feds if he gets busted with the kiddy porn on his computer or try to deport him.
  10. He wants you to carry a package for him onto the subway at rush hour.
  11. He thinks that he has finally found someone dumb enough to listen to his fanatical speech.
  12. He is scared to walk the streets at night and needs an escort.

Why do the American brothers want to befriend the immigrant brother?

  1. He needs help making hijrah.
  2. He wants to get with his sister.
  3. He is attracted to the local terrorist organization in the brothers nation of origin.
  4. He needs help learning Arabic…or Urdu if he is a Taabliquee.
  5. He thinks the brother looks holy and real in his thobe and turban.  
  6. He is trying to scam him out of some money he needs for being a new Muslim.
  7. He wants a job at the Masjid.
  8. He wants to live off the generosity of Muslims.
  9. He wants to sell the brother some incense and oil.
  10. He wants to rob the brothers store.
  11. He wants to go on jolla for the free food.
  12. He is a lost whiteboy going native running around with a turban two sizes too big on his head.