An HIV Story: A Brother from the Hood Marries the Immigrant Girl

Anyone who has spent a lot of time amongst singles in the American-Muslim community, particularly in diverse masjids, will know that there is often a hostility from the parents of immigrant girls when they want to marry an African-American Muslim brother. This normally happens when a girl has been raised in this country and may not look forward to marrying her cousin from back home or some random guy from her country the family has found and she feels American and wants to marry someone similar to her. Then you have the brother, who probably prefers an immigrant sister to an African-American sister, and this creates the desire. The sister has grown up in the home under the protection of her family and is not wise to the ways of the world (but is book smart) and the brother may come from the streets and have miles of game with an Islamic twist he can run on a naïve girl. If the family objects to there proposed union they are labeled mindless bigots and racists.

Such a situation has recently occurred in Northern Virginia. An African-American Muslim brother from the Bronx, who is a slick talker, met an Indian Muslim girl and she fell madly in love with him. The family fiercely objected; but eventually gave in and blessed the union and this is a good and a bad thing. It is good that the family came around on the issue of race; but it is bad that the family didn’t ask for more information on his family, friends and background.

The couple got married and had a child and things appeared to be going good until he started getting arrested for going onto campus and stealing the textbooks of students and reselling them. Now aside from this being haram, a crime, and a weak hustle the marriage stayed in tact but the girls family separated themselves from the couple and told them they are now on their own (which is typical of Muslim families when they marry off their girls).

Now, to make matters worse, it turns out that this brother from the Bronx has tested positive for HIV! And African-American brothers wonder why immigrant families are reluctant to marry of their daughters to them; they are not sophisticated to tell the difference between a Harvard-educated black man and a dopefiend from the Bronx. To your average immigrant Muslim they are just all filthy and dirty black people.

If this story doesn’t make you think about things while you are gorging yourselves during iftar I don’t know what will.

Mr. Conservative

If anyone gets a chance to watch Mr. Conservative: Goldwater on Goldwater on HBO I recommend it (after watching the back episodes of season 4 of The Wire on Demand) it tells the story, from many different angles, of a remarkable man who is so unlike any figure I can think of day in American political life. The only thing I will disagree with in the message of this film is that Goldwater was a war-monger, anti civil-rights, and far to the right on economic policy and a notorious hater of organized labor; how he can be considered a liberal in any day and age baffles me? Those liberals who speak fondly of him today are those who are in lock step with the right on everything but gay rights and other cultural issues.

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3 thoughts on “An HIV Story: A Brother from the Hood Marries the Immigrant Girl

  1. as salaam alaikum,
    and Muslim-Americans don’t want to educate their children about STDs! On top of that some Muslims think that requesting an STD test is like accusing them of fornication! What a shame. people just don’t get it.

  2. Ouch.Thats a really sad story.I read this and thought back to when I was in Madressah in my teens and the topic of nikkah came up and how we were taught how to ask such questions and actually get tested .I would think most people do that given today’s statistics of STIs.I think more should be done on educating muslims,especially before marriage on such issues to avoid unneccessary pain.

    Naima

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