I once had an argument at a masjid in St. Louis with a group of brothers who told me that a good Christian woman would naturally want to marry a Muslim and I told them they were nuts.
A good religious Christian woman will want to marry a Christian man and have Christian kids and operate a household based on the teachings of the Bible. In her mind, a Muslim is a kafr, a disbeliever who is damned to hell unless he accepts Jesus Christ as his personal Lord and Savior. So why would she want to marry someone who is damned? She wouldn’t is the answer. A Christian woman who marries a Muslim nine time out of ten is not serious about her religion or just some kind of cultural Christian with no commitment to the deen.
I once heard a Muslim Imam say, who is a Salafi leader, that he had never seen a serious Muslim marry a non-Muslim, and there is a lot of truth to that; but many of these brothers became serious about the deen after getting married. Then again this particular Imam has been married and divorced more than twenty times and another well-known Imam said, “ when it comes to marriage don’t listen to him, he doesn’t know a lot about that; but when it comes to divorce he is a real expert.”
If you do not know brothers who have been married more then 20 times, or at least 10, you have not been around in the community that much amongst the converts. Of course many of you know people who have and you don’t know about that aspect of their lives. Many of the sisters, after about the 4th or 5th failed marriage swear of the deen or leave the deen; but brothers stick around and are fruitful and multiplying ensuring the job security of a future generation of correctional officers.
Abu Musluma, Imam of Masjid Ahlus-Sunnah in East Orange, NJ said he graduated from the Islamic University of Medinah and returned home and all he dealt with were family problems from local Muslims. These are serious issues and if we do not address them they are not going away and there is no escaping them because all of the Muslim community is intertwined. Brothers and sisters try and run from the problems of the American-Muslim by marrying an immigrant or someone from oversees and then run into a new set of problems.
Because of these factors I believe that every Muslim conference that is held should focus on the issue of marriage and family because that is the main priority of the community. We cannot import a failed system from Muslim countries, despite what some say, and many of us cannot rely on our upbringings. It is time for a new day. Or Muslim organizations can hold conferences talking about the value of the siwak ( Taabliquees), or who is off the minhaj (salafis), Election 2008 (Ikwaan) or the Khalifah (Hizb-ut-Tahrir); but none of that means anything if the institution of the American-Muslim family is not functioning well; and it is not at this time. We also cannot fall into this Oprah-like state were we feel everyone’s pain and fail to condemn anybody and anything because we do not want to hurt anyone’s feelings. In order to move forward some peoples feelings are going to have to be hurt.
Great fight card in New York at Madison Square Garden tonight for those who are opting out of the Tarver-Hopkins PPV. Ethnic pride will be on display as the undefeated Puerto Rican star Miguel Cotto takes on the undefeated Italian-American from Brooklyn Paulie Malignaggi and “Irish” John Duddy , of Derry, takes on the rugged Freddie Cuevas. I’m 50-50 on going as of now but I like Cotto in 12 and Duddy by KO within 6.
New York is home to a lot of people from Trinidad and I have a good boxing buddy from Trinidad and I am sure he is happy that in their first World Cup Match ever they managed a tie with the heavily-favored Sweden. England looked shaky against Paraguay, I was waiting to see the Robot Dance from Peter Crouch but was cheated after he didn’t score in the 1-0 win. I predicted England to go all the way but after this I’m not so sure; but what the hell does an American know, I better stick to the sweet science.
The links will be back up soon, I am just doing some things with redesigning right now and my time is limited.